The sun goes down
The stars come out
And all that counts
Is here and now
My universe will never be the same
I'm glad you came . Change this with yours.
change this with yours xxx
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the past few days have flown by really fast. and many things have happened. some of which were big events.
like Nenek passed away on Tuesday. it came as a shock to many. cos the doctor gave a message to her children that she was in a critical condition at 7++ then she was pronounced dead near to 8am. it didnt sink in to me at first. frankly speaking, i was upset but not so much. reason being, i was never close to her.
but seeing Ayah cry just made me tear cos i understand how hard it must be to lose your parents. even if its just for a little while, you feel just that bit more vulnerable. more scared. more incomplete? more lost.
but what belongs to Allah, will return to Allah. and we all must be brave. so all my doa to Nenek Sa'diah. i'm sorry i didnt get to know you more but i love you still.
and also another being an impactful event after a 4 days trip to Terengganu: releasing the baby turtles to the ocean at night :) we were late but we got to release 15 baby turtles. so out of the 15, i got to release 3 baby turtles. and they were so teeny they're just the size of my palm. *sorry have no pictures cos the flash would blind the teeny baby turtle* so we let them go at the cordoned area *cos the baby turtles were so small and it was so dark, anyone can just step on them* and the baby turtle heroes *thats what i call the people who were in charge of the program* shone their torchlights for the baby turtles to swim towards.
it was an awwww moment as we watched those baby turtles go off to the ocean.. and its when i started thinking of how kinda similar i am with those baby turtles. cos the shore is singapore, and the ocean is malaysia and all those other countries im planning to go to. and it made me think: good, at least, im not alone. so to my 3 baby turtles, try not to get eaten by those sea predators, i hope you get to grow big and strong and just keep swimming :D FIGHTING!
and another one is a confession. 2 weeks back, i met kern to pass jl's present. and the one thing he said before i left was we'll see you before you fly off. and on the way home, those words kinda chewed on my mind. and the next day i started crying. and what made it worse was the fact that it was Ayah's birthday and we were out with my paternals at a food place. the waiters were staring at me but the waterworks were uncontrollable. fortunately im a silent crier unless provoked. so there i sat crying pathetically on 7 words, wiping those tears away when i thought it was a bit obvious & going off to the toilet once in a while to pass motion cos i had a bit of food poisoning.
firstly, cos im not flying off. the KLIA airport is impossibly far far far away from my aunt's house & school. im only going to malaysia not australia or something.
secondly, its not possible. everyones going to work and school and ns. which made me think of them more and all the good times of year 3. year 3 was like SHINee's album title Y.O.U. year of us. life flashed before me. i mean life flashbacks always happen at those moments; like leaving for an indefinite period of time & when you just had bad food the day before. which made it so much harder not to cry.
i'ld lie if i say im ok. but i know pretty soon i'll get bored of being scared so until then..
this has been my last entry before my loooooong hiatus.
so goodbye fer now (:
Helped by xoxo
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of fear
Thursday, June 24, 2010
the past few days have flown by really fast. and many things have happened. some of which were big events.
like Nenek passed away on Tuesday. it came as a shock to many. cos the doctor gave a message to her children that she was in a critical condition at 7++ then she was pronounced dead near to 8am. it didnt sink in to me at first. frankly speaking, i was upset but not so much. reason being, i was never close to her.
but seeing Ayah cry just made me tear cos i understand how hard it must be to lose your parents. even if its just for a little while, you feel just that bit more vulnerable. more scared. more incomplete? more lost.
but what belongs to Allah, will return to Allah. and we all must be brave. so all my doa to Nenek Sa'diah. i'm sorry i didnt get to know you more but i love you still.
and also another being an impactful event after a 4 days trip to Terengganu: releasing the baby turtles to the ocean at night :) we were late but we got to release 15 baby turtles. so out of the 15, i got to release 3 baby turtles. and they were so teeny they're just the size of my palm. *sorry have no pictures cos the flash would blind the teeny baby turtle* so we let them go at the cordoned area *cos the baby turtles were so small and it was so dark, anyone can just step on them* and the baby turtle heroes *thats what i call the people who were in charge of the program* shone their torchlights for the baby turtles to swim towards.
it was an awwww moment as we watched those baby turtles go off to the ocean.. and its when i started thinking of how kinda similar i am with those baby turtles. cos the shore is singapore, and the ocean is malaysia and all those other countries im planning to go to. and it made me think: good, at least, im not alone. so to my 3 baby turtles, try not to get eaten by those sea predators, i hope you get to grow big and strong and just keep swimming :D FIGHTING!
and another one is a confession. 2 weeks back, i met kern to pass jl's present. and the one thing he said before i left was we'll see you before you fly off. and on the way home, those words kinda chewed on my mind. and the next day i started crying. and what made it worse was the fact that it was Ayah's birthday and we were out with my paternals at a food place. the waiters were staring at me but the waterworks were uncontrollable. fortunately im a silent crier unless provoked. so there i sat crying pathetically on 7 words, wiping those tears away when i thought it was a bit obvious & going off to the toilet once in a while to pass motion cos i had a bit of food poisoning.
firstly, cos im not flying off. the KLIA airport is impossibly far far far away from my aunt's house & school. im only going to malaysia not australia or something.
secondly, its not possible. everyones going to work and school and ns. which made me think of them more and all the good times of year 3. year 3 was like SHINee's album title Y.O.U. year of us. life flashed before me. i mean life flashbacks always happen at those moments; like leaving for an indefinite period of time & when you just had bad food the day before. which made it so much harder not to cry.
i'ld lie if i say im ok. but i know pretty soon i'll get bored of being scared so until then..
this has been my last entry before my loooooong hiatus.
so goodbye fer now (: